All his life, Alcatraz has been kicked out of foster homes when time after time he has been unlucky enough to break things. On his thirteenth birthday he receives his inheritance—a bag of sand. Alas, the sand is soon stolen by the evil librarians. Now he must wrap his mind around the reality so long hidden by librarian lies and rescue the sand. But how will he prevail against such a powerful enemy with only the help of those whose greatest gifts are the ability to arrive late, the ability to fall down and the ability to speak in utter gibberish?